Expectations

Faith and Joy on a ride--with their helium balloons!
Jillian and Anna Mei at the park.

Faith and Joy in the ball pit.

The girls with An, their ballet teacher, and her two daughters (on the back row). The fountain in her house is on the left.

Hello, all--

We are coming to the close of our first Tet holiday. It is amazing to me that most stores are still closed. All the local hair salons, bookstores, bike repair shops, furniture stores, and most everything other than food places still have their doors locked. It is slightly easier to get a taxi, but still requires patience. From everything I had heard about Tet, I was expecting more frustration. Not that there haven't been moments...

The day before yesterday, the girls and I walked a few blocks to a local "carnival" that opened on an empty lot for Tet. There was one kiddie ride, and several "games of chance." Vendors also sold balloons and food. We met a couple of friends there--ladies who are here teaching English. A Vietnamese man started talking to me (as much as he could with very little English). First, he wanted me to buy balloons. I told him "not yet." Then, he seemed to take a keen interest that the man in charge of the ride did not charge too much for Faith and Joy. When he seemed to get a little too attached, Dawn, Susan and I decided we had better leave, and maybe we could come back and he would be gone. That was our hope, but we never expected him to leave with us! He came with us down the street, first arguing with Dawn that I must be kidnapping Vietnamese children, I couldn't be the mother of three Asian girls! She assured him that I was their mother, and pointed out that they all spoke English. That did not satisfy him. He kept walking with us--I kept the girls at the front of our procession with me, then Susan was the buffer, and Dawn (who speaks the most Vietnamese, having lived here for 2 years) kept the man at the back and tried to persuade him to leave. After awhile, he told her that he wanted me to give him money for all of his "help." By this time, we had walked several blocks, and when we came to a cafe, we went in and sat down for a soda to try to get away from this man. He continued to call into us. Finally, the lady who owned the cafe told him that if he did not leave us alone, she would call the police. Finally he left. Whew!

A couple of weeks ago, the ballet teacher invited us to make a Tet visit to her home on Jan. 29. So, yesterday afternoon, the girls and I took a taxi to her address. I tried to prepare the girls to be polite and to withhold comments about the house, the food, etc. Although the outside was very plain with a heavy iron gate for a front door, the inside was lovely. There was even a waterfall beside the stairs, with fish in a pool at the bottom! The teacher An and her two daughters (ages 13 and 14) were so gracious. They brought out candy, coconut, nuts, cookies, a Tet cake, some kind of "gelled" meat, and orange soda. An offered me beer, but I stuck with the soda. They gave the girls the red envelopes with some money. It was very sweet. An does not speak English, but her 14 year-old daughter, Tran, translated for us.

During the visit at An's house, she invited us to a dance performance at a local park tonight. While Tony worked, four of the girls and I went out again (Elizabeth decided to stay home)--with Dawn, and went to the park. It turned out to be an amusement park with many small rides. Dawn told us there is also a zoo there (with less than 10 different animal species). Rides cost about 25 cents each, and a helium balloon was about 55 cents. Cotton candy is about 18 cents. The behavior of the crowds is something else. There is so much pushing--the lines do not form in any kind of orderly fashion. Everyone just stands in a mob near the entrance, then pushes to the front when the gate opens to admit people. Faith and Joy had balloons tied to their wrists. We had trouble getting them off for them to play in a ball pit--the attendant broke the string with her teeth! For the moving rides, I was allowed to stand next to the ride or the track while the girls rode--no waiting outside the fence. And, when Anna Mei and Faith rode a mini-roller coaster, the attendant told me to let them stay on for a second ride without a ticket.

So, it has been an interesting week. In these and other events, I have been reminded that much of my frustration comes when life does not match my expectations. How much more peaceful to recognize that things are just "different"--without judging them as "bad"--and let God's grace flow through me.

One other note, something that I did not expect during Tet...with many people flying the Vietnamese flag, I have been so happy to see our American flag hanging in the classroom. How thankful I am to tell people we are from America. I never really thought before of the great blessing it is to have been born in the United States. Perhaps that is the way people feel all over the world about their own country.

I hope that your joy, strength and peace today exceeds all your expectations! May you be surprised continually by His great love!

Grace and peace!

As Tet Begins

Tony answers some of the reporter's questions while shopping for Tet.

Hello, all-

Tet officially begins at midnight tonight, which is 12 noon Sunday for those in the eastern US. Already we can see how different life is here during this holiday. The banks closed yesterday and will remain closed for the entire week. Every little cafe around our house has already locked its doors for the week. We tried for about 40 minutes to get a taxi to Big C yesterday--after calling three different taxi companies, we finally found one that had drivers working. At Big C, pandomonium was the order of the day--there were no shopping carts, not one. The procedure for obtaining one is not the most simple: The entrance to the supermarket is on the second floor. Checkout is on the third floor. Then, most people take their purchases in the cart back to the first floor to leave (or even to the basement where the parking garage is. So, to get a cart, you have to go back to the first floor.

So, Bee and I got the cart and shopped for the next 4-5 days--not an easy thing to do with a refrigerator the size of a cooler. I couldn't help but be amused at shopping with Bee. If I picked up two packages of pancake mix, she put one back. When I pointed out the ground beef, she asked the butcher for about a half a pound. So, there was some "give and take" between us (plus, I put the extra pancake mix back in the cart when she was getting broccoli--ha!). Buying vegetables is interesting. In the vegetable section, there are plastic bags, much like in the states. But, when you put the produce in the bag, you must have it weighed and priced in the produce section. If there is no price on it at checkout, you cannot buy it. Also, the attendant not only weighs and affixes the price sticker, he or she also twists the top of the bag closed. If the seal is broken, you cannot buy the produce.

Usually, when leaving Big C, there are 6-7 taxis parked out front waiting to drive people. Of course, not yesterday. And, while we were shopping, the rain started. Bee finally flagged down a taxi. The front of Big C has several steps, so the cart cannot be taken all the way down to the curb. That makes an interesting (and wet) procedure in loading the groceries. The driver backed up on the sidewalk close to the gate at the house, so that helped in getting the groceries into the house.This morning, it was another adventure in getting a taxi. The driver said he would return to the church at 12 noon to take us home...but, at 12:30, we finally were able to get another taxi back.Mr. Bo somehow learned about the television interview. He invited our whole family over for the first airing of it--at 6:00 am on Tuesday morning! The second airing will be Wednesday at 6:30 pm. Unfortunately, Mr. Bo prefers the morning show. He said to bring the whole family and we'll drink coffee (that's good--I'll need it!).

As joyous as Tet is for the Vietnamese, I'm sure it has to be stressful for many people. There are many rules about what to do, when to visit, what to take, even what colors to wear. In a country where there is so much poverty, it has to be difficult to provide food for guests, spruce up the house, buy flowers, etc.We welcome your prayers, that we will be a blessing to people we greet at Tet. We want to put people at ease, to go through our day showing compassion, kindness, honor and grace. May it begin in our own hearts and home!

Grace and peace!

Preparing for Tet

Anna Mei was the first one of us brave enough to try the Tet cake!
A Tet food vendor at the market--from the left, some kind of small bird eggs, beef, hot dogs, vegetables and fish. The corn kernels underneath are stir fried.

Flowers, flowers and more flowers for sale!

The Tet Cake: Sticky rice on the outside, a peanut paste on the inside. The green color is from the leaves that the cake is wrapped in for storage.

Here are the girls with their balloons.

Hello, all--

The rainy season has ended (sigh of relief), and the days are much warmer and sunny, for the most part. We are getting ready for the biggest holiday in Vietnam, called Tet. The schools dismiss for 2 weeks, all the stores will close for 2 days--even ballet is cancelled for 3 weeks. The whole town is decorated, there are gifts, special foods, many traditions, lots of visiting to family and friends. Most of the foreigners we know leave the country because it is crowded, prices are raised, and most stores, restaurants, theaters, etc. are closed. The main Tet celebration is this Monday through Wednesday. It kicks off with fireworks at midnight on Sunday night. Duc says we should be able to see them from our 3rd floor balcony, so I think we will not even try to get down close to the river, even though the girls want to try to stay up late and go.

A local television station contacted our family about filming us for a story about foreigners in Danang for their first experience of Tet. So, yesterday, a cameraman and reporter met us at Big C and followed us through the store as we bought some Tet traditions: a special "cake" made of sticky rice and a peanut filling, fresh pickles, and pickled onions, and some sweets. Also, Tet is a time of beautifying your home, so there are flowers everywhere. We went to a market and bought some flowers, and I bought an arrangement of bamboo--I love it! The girls also got big helium balloons. The news story will air next week; we will probably watch it with Mr. and Mrs. Bo.Tet is the lunar new year. There are many superstitions and beliefs about many things. Mostly, though, people talk about the holiday as a time for family--it is the time when everyone returns home. Children receive "lucky money" gifts in small red envelopes. Tomorrow or Saturday, I will do a big shopping with Bee--getting enough food in the house for 3 or 4 days, since the stores may not be open. Bee will be visiting her family, so she will not return to our house until Thursday.

Personally, I think the excitement that comes with a new year is a God-given desire for all things to be made new. What a wonderful witness to the kingdom of God that the old can pass away and there is hope for the future! In so many of the Tet traditions that have been explained to us, at the root is the desire for blessing in the lives of the people you love, and for yourself. It is a time of leaving the past behind and moving on to something new, something better. It has given us a chance to share a little about our faith, and the God who gives new life.

May His love touch your life in a new way today.

Grace and peace!

Bee's Housewarming

Joy holding the chick.
This mother and her calf wandered by while we were at Bee's house.

This was one of the tables after the meal!

This man was so kind. I just had to have a picture!

Bee and her husband receive our gifts.

Bee's new house.

Hello, all--

We are ever-learning the customs of Vietnam. A couple weeks ago, Bee brought us a handwritten invitation to a gathering at her new house. The "party" was this past Sunday. I would describe it as a "housewarming" although the main activity was a full meal for 60-70 guests. Christians here use this time also for a prayer of the home's dedication to the Lord, asking for His protection and blessing. The prayer time took place on Saturday, since Bee's house is about a 30-minute motorbike ride from her church in Danang, and the pastor could not get to her house easily after the morning service. Joy surprised us all by wanting to spend the night with Bee on Saturday night before the party. She had a great time!

To prepare for this event, Bee must have cooked for at least a couple of days. There was rice, shrimp, chicken, beef, vegetables, soup, and more. Bee and her husband had rented round tables and plastic stools for the guests, and had moved all their furniture outside beside the house to make room.

It is customary to bring gifts and money to the new homeowner, specifically, money to offset the expense of the meal. This is also the custom for the wedding reception. The gift should be at least 6-70,000 dong per guest ($3-$4). All gifts are given to the family upon arrival, but none of the packages or envelopes are opened in the presence of the guests.

We were, of course, somewhat of an attraction, since only one or two others at the party spoke any English at all.

Bee lives out in the countryside--we saw many rice fields and several farm animals. The house across the street held a treasure for the girls' attention: chicks. Oh, how they begged to bring one home! (No, I did not give in!)

It was a great afternoon. I could tell that it meant so much to Bee and her husband for us to attend. It was a joy to honor her in this small way.

May your life, too, be blessed with good friends and may we all have the good sense to appreciate them and honor them whenever possible!

Grace and peace!

Exploring the Neighborhood

The harbor
Neighborhood Street

A sure sign the rain is leaving--laundry hanging outside!

Jillian and I near the harbor--I am hoping to replace my baggy clothes soon!

Hello, all--

I am not sure if I mentioned that I, too, was blessed with a bicycle for Christmas. With the rain subsiding over these past three days, Jillian, Anna Mei, Elizabeth and I have taken to our wheels and started riding around our neighborhood. Since our taxis mostly come and go on only one or two streets, we have not seen some of the smaller streets behind our house, or those that shoot off the main streets.

I am so thankful that we did not move. The streets around here are very quiet, and much wider than the street where we had planned to move. So, I feel better about riding with my five travellers. When all six of us ride, we head to a nearby harbor. There is hardly any traffic on the street there, a large sidewalk and a view of the water. Today, with the "older girls," we looked for new avenues. Little businesses are everywhere. Several little "quick marts"--some that are so small that all their merchandise fits on a counter at the front--no need to go inside to shop. I know enough Vietnamese to ask "How much is this?", to understand the answer and say "thank you." I can also tell people that Jillian is from America when they look perplexed about her not conversing with them in Vietnamese.

The homes of most families here are very small. There are many windows and doors to allow air circulation, most have no glass, but shutters close at night or for the rain. One house we passed today had a piece of chain link fence at the window. I'm sure it is very serviceable for hanging things---like clothes that need to dry.

We tried to ride by the harbor on our way home. We didn't stay long--the smell was overpowering. It's not the freshest aroma on a good day, but today it was stifling. The stench of fish was everywhere. There was a strong breeze that seemed to carry the smell and drape it around like a blanket. I felt so sorry for the people who live and work there. Many of them live on their boats, which are small. One end of the boat holds nets and a scant supply of equipment. A plastic tarp makes a tent over the other side of the boat. Usually a change of clothes hangs inside the tent and there is a stool or two for sitting underneath. Not everyone who works there lives on their boats. Some of the "boats" look like large round baskets, about 4 feet in diameter. Unbelievably, they float and the fisherman stands in the middle and guides the vessel with a long pole. Our neighbor told me that it is very difficult to balance in these boats. No kidding.

On our way home this afternoon, Anna Mei's pedal came off. We were ready to dismount the bikes and walk them home, when a man stopped on a motorbike and offered his help. He tried to repair it right there, but needed some tools. So, through pantomime, he said he would take the bike to his house (nearby), fix it and bring it back. Of course, a crowd had gathered to watch the proceedings. So, off he went. We wondered if he would return, but I told Jillian that all the ladies standing there to observe would probably be upset if they thought he was stealing the bike. Sure enough, in a few minutes, he returned with the bike and we rode home. It touches my heart that people who have so much need all around them still reach out to help others. Living here, we are well aware that we are "ripe" to be taken advantage of. But, the Lord brings people along who want to help. This fellow refused any money. He just wanted to help a child with a broken bike pedal.We have had our share of people trying to increase prices, take too much money, give back too little change--but we've also met so many people who are kind and helpful, shy and reserved, yet eager to communicate. Everywhere we go, we are greeted with "Hello!"--the only English word that many people here know.

So, that was our day (other than school, of course). I have to say, it was a good one. I am grateful to the One who gives every good and perfect gift. He pours joy on simple days like syrup on pancakes--how sweet it is!

Grace and peace!

Oh Well...

Oops! Oh well...she's a beauty, no matter what!

Wild scissor woman!

Hello, all--

It's Sunday night. It's been a good day. Yesterday was very damp and cold, but today dawned warmer and we were blessed with sunshine!


A team from Youth With A Mission visited our church today. They are based in San Fransisco and are at the end of several-week trip through parts of Asia. They led worship and shared testimonies.


After church, Tony and I thought that it was a good day to try something new, so we had the taxi drop us off downtown near the river and we went walking to find a "local" restaurant. These are the establishments that are all "open-air"--even the ones enclosed with walls have no glass on the windows. Typical food is noodles, rice, pork, chicken or fish. The rainy season is a great time to try out some new places because it is not hot to sit outside to eat.


The place we selected looked somewhat like a cross between a diner and a cafeteria. There was a counter, and the tables were laminant. The chairs were blue, red, and orange and were bolted on to a metal frame at the tables. Groups of three or four tables were joined at the ends with a metal tray to hold condiments. The menus were laminated sheets of paper. There was one menu in Vietnamese and one in English. The menu said "Hamburger" so we ordered six (for the girls and Tony), plus five orders of french fries, and fruit smoothies. I ordered "rice noodles in beef stew." The "hamburgers" turned out to be a slice of pork (somewhat like a pale Spam), with lettuce, tomato, mayo, and a thin spread of liverwurst paste (I kid you not). It actually tasted pretty good to the girls--they all ate. The french fries were ,,, french fries. My stew was beef pieces, carrot chunks, and onion in a tomato based broth, with rice noodles (they look a lot like Ramen noodles, but they are almost transparent in color). The fruit smoothies were a light red in color. They tasted of banana and watermelon, with some type of citrus fruit as well. Very good.


The condiments on the table were interesting, two kinds of soy sauce, two kinds of hot sauce, and chopsticks (no salt, pepper, sugar, ketchup, or napkins). After lunch, we took a walk along the river. It was very nice. There is a large paved plaza that runs along the river--plenty of room for the girls to run. We found a grassy area also. There was a slight incline. Faith immediately laid down in the grass and rolled down the hill, cackling all the way.


Tonight, Faith, Joy and Elizabeth all needed their bangs trimmed. I don't cut much hair, but I do trim bangs. Well...at least I used to. Everything went fine with Joy and Faith. Elizabeth's bangs were very long, since she had been growing them out--past her chin. I don't know what happened, but I whacked them off way to short. When Tony saw her, he said "WHO did that?" She giggled, and said, "Mommy had an accident!" Thankfully, she thinks it is funny (I would have imagined her bursting into tears). And, we know from experience that they will indeed grown back.


So, that has been our day. The girls and I cleaned up the supper dishes together. I love moments like that--we were singing show tunes, dancing with dirty plates, and just having a good time being together. We nearly had a fight between Anna Mei and Jillian about who would GET to wash the dishes (I love it!). It turns out that washing is preferable to drying, sweeping the floor and wiping off the table. Go figure. Jillian won out this time. I did rinse and dry duty, Anna Mei did the floor and worked on the table. Elizabeth helped in general. Faith and Joy were on "puppy sitting" duty. Dad was at his favorite pasttime--reading in his easy chair. I can't complain, though. He had finished up cleaning the kitchen this afternoon, while I had a nap!


This is the kind of day that I fear the girls will not remember, but one that I treasure. Nothing remarkable, but a wonderful contentment and the joy that comes with living peaceful moments without rush.


Grace and peace!

Finding Our Way

Hello, all-

Joy may be the last Brewer girl to lose a baby tooth, but she made up for it by losing two on the same night! There is now a nice gap in the front bottom row. She loves it.

Today I took Joy and Anna Mei to ballet class. Last week, the teacher surprised us all by giving them matching pink dance leotards. Since Anna Mei and Joy were the only two in the class to receive them, I wondered if we had missed something in a previous week...or if I was supposed to purchase them...or if they were just checking sizes... I called Linh to talk to the teacher on the phone. It turns out that she just saw the leotards and wanted to buy them for the girls (dance leotards are not easy to find here-- many people have them made). They were a gift. I felt bad for the other girls, although no one in the class seemed to pay much attention. Even the other parents who were there were all smiles. Very different.

On the way to ballet, our taxi driver spoke a little English--enough to say "Hello, madame. How are you? Where you go?" That's all it took for Anna Mei. She talked to him non-stop the remainder of the ride. He was grinning from ear to ear, which she took to mean comprehension. She needed no further encouragement. Even I had to concentrate to catch her monologue, which went something like this...

Wow, this bridge sure has a lot of traffic today. When we get really good on our bikes, we're going to ride across the bridge. But that might take awhile. Hey, maybe you can drive the taxi next to us on our bikes and we can wave to you. But you will have to be careful, we are only allowed to turn right on to streets right now. But when we get really good in traffic, we're going to ride to Big C and ballet and Metro and all over. Do you have a bike? I really like to ride. I also like to dance and paint. Do you have kids? You can bring them over to our house to play sometime. It's okay if they don't speak English--I know some Vietnamese. Xin chao! Ban co que khong? Cam on. Toi tam tuoui. ("Hello! How are you? Thank you. I am 8 years old.")

There was more, but you get the picture. The words just poured out of her at lightening speed.All these things made me think today about learning to live in a new culture and adjustments. Which reminded me that I am continuing to learn how to live in the Kingdom. Attitudes, reactions, values, etc. are different in this Kingdom. It is a new "normal." I can choose to assimilate and allow the Holy Spirit to change me, or I can resist and insist on living my own way--even though it will make things harder on me. I may not understand the "whys" of life in the Kingdom. But life will be more enjoyable, peaceful, contented, and productive if I humble myself and give up my "own way."

May your day be joyous because the King reigns in your heart today!

Grace and peace!